Clay Hand Number One

When I was a college student, I heard my journalism professors complain that journalists earn awards instead of money.  I feel for journalists!  Of course, we moms don’t earn awards or money, but that only makes sense considering that every single year we get Mother’s Day, on which day we hit the big time!

This year for Mother’s Day I was presented with some extremely valuable art.  First, I receieved “Butterfly,” a brilliant watercolor by Nikoline Updike.  Updike was giddy with excitement for several days before the initial showing; this is the most beautiful piece she has ever rendered.  Ever.

Updike’s glory was shortlived, though, because her older sister, who is also an artist, presented me with something even more valuable, a piece titled “Clay Hand Number One.”  Yes, those firstborns seem to specialize in making the rest of us look bad.




















Now I know that some of you are looking at these pieces and thinking, “I would much rather hang ‘Butterfly’ in my kitchen than  ‘Clay Hand Number One.'”  If I am describing your thought process, don’t worry; I was art illiterate once too, and I will explain.  “Clay Hand Number One” was created with clay, a scarce artistic medium.  Almost anything created with clay easily outvalues paper pieces.  Also, “Clay Hand Number One” is first edition.  No doubt, this piece will be copied by other rising artists in our school, and someday I may even have an extensive collection of clay hands, but there can only be one original.

Now there’s one more thing to consider, which even some art experts might be thrown off by.  “Clay Hand Number One” appears to have a blemish in the bottom left corner, which would make it less valuable, of course.  But as the world’s leading Anastasia Updike authentication expert, I can tell you this is not a blemish at all, but a mark of authenticity–it’s the artist’s wart print, which adds a personal touch that both art enthusiasts and authentication experts go wild over.

So all things considered, “Butterfly” would look absolutely gorgeous hanging on anyone’s fridge, but “Clay Hand Number One” is an instant collector’s item and is almost worth it’s weight in antimatter.

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One Response to Clay Hand Number One

  1. Wart print!!!!????? HAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!

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